Monday, April 9, 2012

He Forgives

Before Bob and I got married, I asked for book recommendations about marriage from friends. One book that came highly recommended was As For Me and My House by Walter Wangerin, Jr.

I started the book, excited to learn the main lessons that this long-married man had for young couples. The key message? Forgiveness.

I was disappointed. I was expecting something like, take weekly date nights. Leave cute notes around the house for each other. Etc. But no, forgiveness.

I've since realized that Mr. Wangerin was dead-on, not just for marriage, but for most every relationship we encounter. I recently had a big and personal lesson about forgiveness, and I've experienced so much freedom since that time. Like a burden lifted off my shoulders.

I've noticed many times that Dean is an amazing forgiver. If someone wrongs him, he might cry or retreat to mommy for a bit, and then he's right back in the game. He'll hug that person and move on as if no wrong was done. This is not to say that he's not cautious, but he'll seemingly put it right behind him. Dean might be "disabled," but he is EXTRA-abled to forgive. And we are called to have faith like a child.

Because of Dean, I've learned more about the foolishness of holding onto unforgiveness and the freedom and joy that can be had by letting go. He lives in the moment and seems so unencumbered by his past or his future. I want that. Yet another way that my child shows me the heart of Jesus more than any "nondisabled" person ever could.



8 comments:

Elizabeth Phillips said...

Amen and amen! I remember when I was single & someone in my Sunday school class asked our pastor what the key to a good marriage was and he said forgiveness. That the one who has been forgiven of much loves much. Whereas I tend to expect everyone to grant me oceans of grace when I dole out grace in a thimble. Also, please forgive me for flaking on our playdate today. I promise not to flake on Wednesday.

sara said...

Love this post.

Ali Foley Shenk said...

Elizabeth, it really didn't faze me! I knew we would get to play and I can sympathize with forgetting something that I should have realized earlier! Do it all.the.time. :)

Janet Gulley said...

I was there just a few weeks ago... How did Dean grow up so much? He looks like such a big school kid.

Laurie said...

Janet, I was thinking the same thing! Ali, just think, not that long ago he was struggling with the walker and look at him run with the backpack! So cool.

Maegan0514 said...

Right on!

Could Dean be any cuter in these pics? OMG, I want to love on him!

Cinra said...

AMEN from me too. Klint too shied away from those who hurt him while he was growing up but only for short moments of time. I believe I've said this before....his Dad was NOT GOOD to him while he was growing up. Now he is good to Klint, but Klint never once stopped loving him like everyone else. As I told his Dad once, he is the one person in this world (except for maybe Kasey's Mom) who loves him unconditionally. It is awesome and truly amazing!!!!

Bob said...

My son is such an angel. A true messenger of God. Thank you my dear wife for illustrating one of his many angelic qualities...