This past week, we spent a lovely time at the family cabin
in northern CA that my husband’s family has owned for decades. Most of our time
was spent at the lake in town, which boasts a pretty beach, water slides,
floating docks, diving boards, you name it. The smaller of two slides is for
kids only, and my boys quickly were interested in trying it out. My 6-year-old
adores anything that allows his to hurl his body through space, and so he went
down the slide again, and again (and again and again…).
On the second day, for whatever reason, he became afraid of
the slide. Multiple times, he climbed to the top of the ladder, paused, sat,
waited… and eventually came back down. The other kids waiting in line were really
gracious and patience, for which I was thankful. But by the third or so time
that my son did this, I was starting to get frustrated. I KNEW he could do it,
and besides, he had already gone so much the day before! I also wanted to teach
him that it wasn’t really all that polite to keep going to the top while other
kids wait, only to climb back down. So on his third or fourth attempt, I pushed
him down. I tried to reason with him from afar to encourage him to slide, but
he wouldn’t go. By now, I’m sure I had the attention of other parents who
looked up to see what was going on. I climbed the ladder, said “you’re going to
go,” and started to give him a firm but gentle push down the slide. My son
said, “No! No!!” and flipped onto his belly while he white-knuckled the sides
of the slide. I pulled him back up to turn him on his bottom (I’m not so mean
to shove him down while facing backward on his belly), and told him, “No, you’re
going down” and pushed him (not HARD) down the slide. Guess what? He came up
out of the water and was smiling and cheering, remembering how much fun it
really was.
I climbed down off the ladder and turned to see about 20
glaring mom eyes right on me. I’m hoping there were a few sympathetic ones in
the crowd, but it sure didn’t look like it. It was as if there were thought
bubbles above their heads saying things like, ‘wow, she’s so mean,’ ‘what the
heck is she thinking?’ “If the kid doesn’t want to go, she shouldn’t make him.’
The part I haven’t even mentioned yet is that my son has special needs, so I
probably seemed even meaner (that really isn’t the point of this article, but
we do treat him the same way we treat our other boys. Any medical/developmental
considerations were taken and I would never endanger him).
My son was safe. My husband was at the bottom ready to catch
him. He had done this before. It was a growing moment. I was the momma bird
almost literally pushing my baby out of the nest so he could experience flight.
My job as a parent is not to provide this safe little bubble
where my children aren’t encouraged to grow. I am not interested in crafting an
environment that is always predictable, comfortable, and stagnant. When an
appropriate opportunity arises, there is a space to grow and be stretched. It’s
a mentality and a skill that is essential for survival in this world. My boys
know that I adore them, and yet I don’t coddle them (except when our 4-year-old
asks to sleep in our bed at night… again, a different article). They will
always have a nest to which they can return and I can kiss them and tell them I
love them a thousand times. And I will continue to teach them how to fly.
2 comments:
Playing computer games makes kids smarter? Experts answer this question "yes".
In the friv 2 site, children are playing games, as well as mathematical games that will help their lessons alongside games. These games contribute to children's intelligent development.
According to a new study by experts, the students who play 5 minutes before dersten are more successful. 580 students participated in the survey conducted in the United States. Children play the game called "Activate", a mental gymnastic developed for research.
It was seen that the students who played this game for 5 minutes before the lesson had a much higher success in the examinations. Focusing and enhancing memory skills, the long-term effect of the game was also positive.
Children who played 20 minutes of play 3 times a week for 4 months were found to be more successful in reading and mathematics exams. However, experts warn parents about computer games.
Some computer games based on mathematics have significant contributions to positively affect the attitude of mathematics. Just as the antibiotic used increases with vitamins, which are catalyzed, one of the catalysts of permanent learning is games. At the point where we combine mathematics and game concepts, permanent learning is likely to have taken place. It should not be surprising that a child who has passed through middle school but still living in the multiplication table knows enough detail to surprise any computer or web application. This will bring the question "Is the problem in the student or in the system?" Although this question is not a single and concrete answer, the important thing is to be able to combine the positive aspects of both. In the United States, serious scientific research and questionnaires on this topic have been made, and some schools have already incorporated some math-based computer games into their teaching systems. They even organize regional or national competitions on these math-based games. The game "24 Game", which has been held since 1980, has become one of the most known games based on mathematics. Later, this version of the game was made in computer versions and wider masses were achieved.
These positive examples give us clues about a new educational model that learns by doing-and-learn, and contributes to learning permanently with mathematical play. In such a system or model, one of the most important elements that help to provide a permanent and complete learning in large student groups is to enrich the content of that course. Mathematics-based computer games are among the most powerful instruments among these enrichments.
Spending too long at the computer is said to have negative effects on children's physical and mental health.
Your children in the friv site can spend time without boredom. They can also play intelligence games on this site.
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